Goodbye, Apathy
by Twilighters13
Summary: Full Summary inside. Bella is married to Jake and meets Edward. She doesn't know what to do. She know she loves Edward and the love she felt for Jake is gone, but she just can't get the guts to tell Jacob that she doesn't love him anymore. All Human


_**Full Summary : **__**Bella Swan is 27 and is happily married with Jacob Black. They got married two years ago after 5 years of dating. She thinks he's perfect, but that was before she met Edward Cullen, a successful, mysterious, handsome writer. She finds herself attracted to him and can't get him out of her mind, even though she knows it's wrong since she's married to Jacob. She still meets Edward whenever she can. Her and Jacob have been distant lately, so why can't she have some fun? She tries to convince herself that, but she still feels unfaithful, even though she knows the spark she felt with Jacob is gone. Edward brings out new emotions in Bella she never knew she could feel. She doesn't know what to do... Stay with Jacob, her best friend and husband, or Edward, the one she longs for and knows she loves.**___

_**Goodbye, Apathy**_

_**Chapter 1**_

_**Bella POV**_

I knew this was wrong. But I couldn't turn back. I was draw to him. His messy copper hair, his crooked smile, and his charm.

I met him at a coffee shop a month ago, and everything after that was a downward spin of emotions. I was being unfaithful to my husband, Jacob. We were high school sweethearts, and after 3 years of dating he finally proposed. He didn't go all out with the proposal; it was simple and sweet. It was during one of the bonfires he and the rest of his friends had. He popped the question, and I remember being ecstatic. And the wedding was the same as the proposal; simple.

I sighed, thinking about how happy I _used _to be with Jacob always made me depressed.

Lately Jacob and I have been… distant. Our daily routine was short hello's, a silent breakfast, and then he went off to work, leaving me alone in our big house. So it was only natural for me to want something new in life right? _Well if it was so right, then why does it seem wrong? _I shook that thought out of my head. I moved on to happier thoughts like Edward Cullen.

Edward was everything I wanted. He was a writer of many top-listed romance novels. What surprised me the most, was how humble he was. He used a fake name on his books, and a portion of the money he made was given to a charity. How could one so beautiful be so self-less?

My phone started vibrating in my side pocket. I pulled it out and glanced at the screen. Jacob. I hesitated before flipping open my cell. My eyes still on the road, I shakily put the phone up to my ear.

"Hello?" I answered. My voice cracked, I was never a good liar. I quietly cleared my throat.

"Hey Bells!" came Jacob's cheerful voice, "Where are you?"

"I, um, I'm headed to the grocery store," I said, trying to sound normal.

"Oh, well when will you be back?" he asked.

"Umm, I don't know, maybe 25 minutes or so." I guess I would have to cut my time with Edward short. I frowned, he was the only person I could actually talk to and not be judged. Unlike Jacob, who always had something else to do, or would get distracted.

"Ok, I'll see you then," he said before he hung up. There was silence on the other end. I hated lying to him, lying to _anyone_. I shut my cell and slid it back in my pocket. I took the next turn, and I could see _our _coffee shop in the distance. Butterflies assaulted my stomach at the thought of being minutes away from Edward. He constantly made me feel things that I never felt. But the one emotion that mattered was that he made me feel loved.

I pulled into an empty parking spot and jumped out of my car. I did a quick check of how I looked and briskly walked to the doors of the coffee shop. I scanned the tables and I locked on a pair of mysterious, emerald green eyes. I smiled and walked over to him.

He stood up from his chair and opened his arms for me. I stepped into his comforting embrace and breathed in his scent. He placed a sweet kiss on my forehead and pulled out a chair for me. Who says chivalry is dead? I plopped down in my seat, and grabbed the coffee that Edward had gotten for me.

I took a small sip, "Thanks," I breathed, "Sorry I'm a little late,"

"It's fine," he grabbed my hand that was lying on the table, "So I sent my stories drafts to the editor," he stated.

"Really? What did she say?" I asked, eager to hear how his latest novel was doing. This one was about forbidden love, and I knew it was going to be a big hit.

"She said that we have another top-seller," he announced, his smile radiant.

I squealed and jumped out of my seat to give him another hug, "Oh, that's great! I'm proud of you!"

He laughed and returned the hug, "Thanks, but enough about me, what's happening with you?"

I sat back down and took another sip of my coffee.

"Hmm, nothing new or exciting really," I admitted.

He raised his eyebrow, "Well what's happening with work? Didn't you say you were working on that divorce case?"

I was a lawyer for a living, and there was a new big case that I was in charge of. It was very stressful for me, but I was pulling through.

I shrugged, "Nothing important, just a lot of grown people cursing at each other over the littlest things," I shook my head.

He looked thoughtful for a moment, "I could never be a lawyer," he chuckled, "Too much stress."

I laughed, "Isn't being a writer stressful too? I mean, with all those deadlines for stories?"

"Not really, plus it's easy for me to handle," He said.

I rolled my eyes, "Moving on, what do you have planned for today?" We would normally go window-shopping or something else productive, but lately Edward has been choosing crazier places like, clubs, or even the _zoo! _When I was with Edward, I didn't care where I was.

"I decided we both would like something relaxing, so what do you say to a nice walk?" he asked, hopefully, his green eyes shining.

"That sounds great!" I smiled. I could never refuse those gorgeous eyes.

We both stood up and headed to the exit.

~X~

We were casually walking hand-in-hand down the streets. The weather was nice during spring. I lived in the small town of Hanover, New Hampshire. I loved the cold weather we had here. It was refreshing.

I looked towards Edward. He knew about Jacob, and knew he was my husband. He thought that I needed to be loved and cared for properly. And he did just that. Edward made me feel wanted, and special, not just some face in the crowd. I squeezed his hand, and he turned to look at me.

He smiled, "What are you thinking about?" he murmured. He brought my hand up to his mouth and placed a gentle kiss on the back.

"Just us," I said casually. His features darkened, "What?"

"When are you going to leave that… that _mutt?" _he sneered.

I looked down, "I don't know," I admitted, "It's just so hard,"

Edward stopped and grabbed my shoulders. I looked up at him, surprised.

"Bella," he said, looking directly in my eyes, "Do you love me?"

"You know I do," I said.

"Then it shouldn't be this hard, that man has not been loving you the way you should be loved!" he nearly shouted.

I placed my hands on his face, waiting for him to calm down. His features softened after a moment and that was when I spoke.

"I'm sorry, but I just don't know how to bring it up. I can't just tell the man that I have been with for seven years that I've fallen out of love. It's easier said than done." I pleaded.

He sighed, "I know, but it's just so frustrating," he said, "I want you to belong to me and me _alone_,"

I leaned my head on his shoulder and wrapped my arms around him in a hug.

"I love you," I whispered. I gently kissed his neck and took a deep breath. I didn't like talking about Jacob with Edward; it just gave me a headache. I've tried to tell Jake but I always manage to talk myself out of it. Edward, on the other hand, didn't have a problem breaking up with his girlfriend. I met him when he was dating a girl named Tanya. After we had gotten serious together he broke up with her so he could be with me. But his story was different and he was stronger. Their relationship was short-lived and halfhearted. Jake and I have real history together. He will always be my best friend.

I looked at my watch; I was supposed to be home an hour ago! I jerked to a stop, pulling Edward with me.

"Oh my gosh!" I gasped, "I need to get home, now!"

"Come on let's hurry back to your car," he said, pulling me back towards the coffee shop.

_**~X~**_

I shakily put the key in the lock. I pushed open the door and stumbled into my house. I placed my purse and keys on the nearest table and toed my shoes off.

"Jake?" I called weakly. He was going to be suspicious, and I couldn't think on the way home so I don't have an excuse.

"Bells? Is that you?" I heard Jacob's gruff voice call from the living room.

"Yeah," I said walking slowly to where Jake was. He was sitting in his old recliner watching TV..

"Where we're you? I was worried sick!" he said, getting off his recliner to stand in front of me.

"I'm sorry there was j-just some, um, traffic on the way home," I stuttered. I held my breath, waiting for his response. That was the only excuse I had at the moment, and I prayed he would believe it.

"Ok, why didn't you call?" he asked.

"Uh, I guess that I didn't think to call," I think I was getting better at this lying thing.

He nodded his head, and took a deep breath.

"Sorry for that, but you worry me sometimes," he said hugging me, his chin on my head.

"I know, sorry for not calling," I whispered. His embrace only felt like a friend's hug to me.

I sighed and pulled away, "I'm just going to head up to bed, ok?" I said looking up at him. I turned and dragged myself up to the bedroom. I dressed in my pajamas and slid under my covers.

Just as I rested my head against the pillow, I heard Jake walking into our room. He eased onto the bed and pulled my hair out of my face as he gently kissed my cheek. I knew what was coming and I wanted no part of it.

He grazed his lips across my face and down to my neck and kissed more passionately. His arms reached around my waist and drew me into him. His eyes were so sad as he felt me pull away. I just couldn't pretend to be in love anymore.

I turned my back towards him and whispered, "I'm not in the mood tonight. I'm exhausted." He sighed and released his hold on me. I could feel his disappointment; I didn't dare turn to look him in the eyes. I knew I was hurting both Jacob and Edward with the decisions I made.

I sighed softly and closed my eyes.

_**~X~**_

_**Hey Readers! Hope you liked my first chapter of my new story! I worked a lot on it with my sister, and I think it turned out good : ) **_

_**Oh and if you have read my other story "**__Messed up Twilight Parody__**" here is a little news. My sister will be putting more HILARIOUS chapters up for that so make sure to add me to author alerts : -) **_

_**Please Review!**_

_**~Twilighters13**_


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